BROKER BREAKDOWN

SPRINGS CRAP!!!

2008-12-25T10:25:00.001-05:00

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2008/12/24/2008-12-24_finally_justice_is_in_the_house_say_vict.html
I thought this guy was a little shaddy, and his houses were poorly built....but i had NO idea it was this bad!!!!

Funkshinally Illiterate

2008-12-09T17:48:00.005-05:00

Yeah, unprecedented speed. Too fast for spell check, I guess. Very 'top-tiered' talent. Somebody better tell the stewardess.

Romantic Getaway

2008-11-26T19:51:00.004-05:00

You will love this Romantic Cabin Getaway. Swing on your love seat built for two. Price. $1,299,999.
Will not last......

Mountain Lion roaming around Southold.

2008-11-24T22:29:00.002-05:00

Mountain Lion roaming Southold. Article says it was spotted in Quogue at one time

http://www2.timesreview.com/ST/Stories/T102308_mountain_lion_jal

2008-11-19T12:58:00.002-05:00

So, for our Corcoran friends that are out there reading this (yes, we know you are, don't deny it), is the rumor that Realogy was offering up shares of the company to Corcoran brokers true? Word is Realogy is SO in trouble that they were begging the Corcoran brokers to buy into the company. Wonder if they were asking the Harrah's employees the same thing???

strange Star article and email

2008-11-15T13:30:00.002-05:00

Me thinks local builder doth protest too much.....
and where in the name of God did he get the "75 Million dollar distress fund"???? i know a lot of people that could use that to help pay their mortgages!!!

Cute 1 Bedroom

2008-11-15T12:32:00.001-05:00

Cute & convenient one (1) bedroom includes extras, such as.......... people sleeping in the bed!

2008-11-10T19:18:00.003-05:00

So here's a response from a long looking (many years now) customer to his broker who asked for some feedback about two houses that he showed him...
"The house in ******** is too vertical for me with my weak ankles and we also thought the property was too long and thin. We can't buy the house on ******* because it is a flag lot. I've always told you we don't like flag lots -- too many neighbors to deal with and somewhat claustrophic in feeling ...."
WEAK ANKLES?!?! now that's a first!

Oh realllly.....!!!

2008-11-10T18:43:00.000-05:00

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27648884

The 3 Billion Club (oops, not 30 but still!)

2008-11-09T16:02:00.005-05:00

A certain broker who shall remain anonymous (but let's just call her "Snippy" for fun) was at a local watering hole alone recently(as is her habit) and struck up a conversation with another broker (let's call him Skippy):
"Guess what?" began Snippy. "I'm in the 3 billion dollar club at my agency."
Skippy raised his eyebrows. "You mean million, right?" he asked.
"No, BILLION," snipped Snippy.
Skippy did the math quickly and realized this was impossible, especially for someone like Snippy who had only been selling real estate for 2 years or so. She would have had to sell like 1000 Three Million houses, or 100 Thirty Million houses. Either way, he knew it was bullshit, but felt sorry for Snippy alone at the bar, attempting to flirt with outrageous lies.
"Well, congratulations!" said Skippy. He's a gentleman.

I always thought Kentucky was cool....

2008-10-02T22:08:00.001-04:00

http://www.kentucky.com/181/story/532854.html

Amazing.

I'm sure this picture will sell this house!!! Looks like someone was evicted.

2008-09-04T12:27:00.000-04:00

http://hreo.com/flash/expansion.jsp?bts=0&innum=39856&inlist=40347,40428,40435,40437,40551,40572,40574,40649,40666,40701,40706,40707,39539,39560,39586,39656,39666,39774,39812,39833,39856,39859,39886,39938,39964,39978,39980,40040,40127,40129,40263,40273,39210,39229,39266,39343,39375,39376,39378,39417,39434,39437,39459,39461,39463,39120&searchType=home&sortOrder=3&vtsort=&limit=4&styles=&fromoh=&oh_id=&oh_flg=

Happy Real Estate News

2008-08-26T21:56:00.003-04:00

Happy real estate news: units sold on Long Island. Yes, I said 'happy'. Here's the link: http://www.happyrenews.com/

Just Let Yourself In, Ma'am....

2008-08-26T18:50:00.003-04:00

My house is for sale, and I am just out of the shower when.....a woman I do not know appears in my front hall. She explains that she is a neighbor (gee, thanks), that she saw the 'for sale' sign (very observant--it's been there for six months) and she'd like to have a look around. After I manage to close my mouth (which has been hanging agape in disbelief), I say "sure go ahead, but I'm going to dry my hair"(dear reader, you must understand that I am in a state of shock at this point). She walks into my bedroom and when she trips over my shoes shoots me a dirty look. I ask her not to sue. I'm not kidding, and neither is she when she assures me she won't. I proceed to dry my hair, and she completes her self-guided tour of my house. She asks me for the name of my contractor, because she thinks he did a good job. When she leaves, she leaves the front door open behind her. Don't let the door hit you on the ass on your way out.
Can somebody tell me where these people come from??!!

What Friends Are For

2008-08-04T16:23:00.002-04:00

Word is that a well known East Hampton resident whose house is - let's just say barely south of the highway and barely off Georgica Rd. - and is a frequent patron of one of Napeague stretch's finer drinking establishments had his outstanding mortgage paid off to get out of foreclosure by the proprietor of said watering hole. What friends are for indeed...

ross school BS

2008-07-12T10:15:00.003-04:00

So, i saw an ad in the local crap paper for a b-52s concert at the overpriced ross school and thought "wow, what fun that could be", went online to buy some tickets.... until i saw the price ...$500 per ticket!!!!
who the hell do these people think they are!?!?!?! $500 dollars each....another over priced concert to benefit the already wealthy ross school...sure, let me grab my checkbook....guess i'll have to wait to see if these also ending up being free like last year's concerts.

wadya mean it's worth less than when we built it?!?! This is the Hamptons, houses are supposed to keep their value!!!

2008-07-08T19:16:00.000-04:00

this is too funny!!!

2008-07-06T12:47:00.001-04:00

http://listoftheday.blogspot.com/2008/04/photobombers-of-day.html

Dutch Boy not an Architect

2008-07-04T09:25:00.005-04:00

I was given a tour of a new house recently by a builder who told me the house had started as a reno but the “architect” screwed it up so badly it had to be torn down. “That’s strange”, I said, “Who is this architect?” The builder said the guy was a scam and had done this to a few other people, then he named a broker from town! Let’s call him the Little Dutch Boy. “He’s not an architect! “I howled, picturing said Broker’s unique hairstyle and long fluttering eyelashes. “The plans were a disaster,” admitted the builder. When the Dutch Boys plans for the house were scrapped and he was given walking papers, word is he was pretty angry, so angry the owner obtained a restraining order to keep him off the job site.

Seen today on Shelter Island

2008-07-02T20:55:00.000-04:00

oh my, it just gets worse....

2008-07-02T20:37:00.001-04:00

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/Movies/07/02/brinkley.divorce.ap/index.html

this is too good....

2008-07-02T15:54:00.000-04:00

http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5hkup5ZpxMcuIEYOKZ_pTMDJQmB_wD91LSSNG1

2008-06-24T10:04:00.000-04:00

here's a good one...

2008-06-20T17:21:00.002-04:00

Broker has American customers living in England (husband works for bank). They are looking for house to rent in Hamptons. Broker finds them the perfect house...negotiations start. Landlord asks broker who the customer is, what they do, etc...
Broker tells him, as is his obligation. Landlord then calls bank's NYC office, asks for his prespective tenant's number in England. Once armed with this he calls said prespective tenant and says he wants to negotiate the deal directly, that it will be better off for both of them....they can get rid of broker and thus the commission...thereby making rental cheaper for tenant.
Tenant then tells Landord to go fuck off!!!!!!
UNBELIEVEABLE!!!!

The Plot Thickens

2008-06-20T10:40:00.002-04:00

This Vid is even more fun as it highlights the attorney for the defense in a warm and fuzzy light.

They are beginning to arrest people

2008-06-20T09:25:00.001-04:00

Ding Dong the witch is dead!

I feel tired...very tired....

2008-06-19T11:06:00.000-04:00

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2008/jun/09/housingmarket.houseprices

More good news.

this is interesting....

2008-06-18T09:47:00.001-04:00

http://finance.yahoo.com/real-estate/article/105253/Signs-of-Softness-Appear-in-Manhattan-Real-Estate

younger, richer, ruder....

2008-06-17T11:35:00.002-04:00

Dude pulls his Aston Martin, Ferrari or whatever a-holes like him drive these days in to a no parking zone on Newtown Lane. The TCO approaches him and says he can't park there. Dude leaves his car and responds "I'll take the ticket". This is from the TCO who ticketed him every hour for the next 5 hours. Still, it's probably less expensive than a Manhattan parking garage....

2008-06-14T20:04:00.002-04:00

JFC, where did all of this Euro-trash come from?!?!
It's like a plane just landed at EH airport and out came the tackiest people you can imagine.
Do these people think they're at the Riviera or something? I've never seen so many people dress up like they're going clubbing just to stroll around Main Street, or go to the beach!!!!
We need our Hamptons back!!!! And it's only June! Arrrggg!

someone found us on the web!

2008-06-12T20:29:00.002-04:00

just found this....looks like we're being found on the world wide web

http://weblogs.newsday.com/entertainment/localguide/outeast/blog/

Hamptons meets New York City? Apparently so, with the opening of a new boutique residential property called “Georgica.” Yes, this building on the Upper East Side, which is touted to feel “expansive, open, and airy,” is named after the Hamptons' one-and-only Georgica Pond. (Still, the Broker Breakdown blog asks, "Maybe 'The Main Beach' or 'The Two Mile Swallow' is next?) Though the building's residents may have to draw upon their imagination to take in that Hampton’s sea breeze, they might not feel too cramped as the building — developed by the Ascend Group — has only two to four units spanning more than 1,000 square feet per floor. Another Hampton similarity is the price tag: Units are going from about $1,750,000 to more than $4 million.
-Lisa Doll-Bruno
Posted by Valerie Kellogg on May 19, 2008 5:13 PM Permalink Comments (0)

What's wrong here?

2008-06-08T20:05:00.002-04:00

this is a rental in our database....looks like fireplace works...

Downsizing to say the least

2008-06-05T13:58:00.002-04:00

Word is that CG is not renewing at 51 Main St. EH (old AMS office) and the agents there are being asked to work "virtually" out of their homes, cars and bars...with a few exceptions I'm sure. It will be a tighter space at 20 Main St. than it already is. Look for a few hat in hands calling on BHS?

recent gossip

2008-06-01T06:21:00.002-04:00

bonnie a, jeannete g, and barbara b have left the company with the most DWIs and have gone to PRU....

bad constipation or something much worse...?!?!

2008-05-27T11:34:00.001-04:00

2008-05-20T21:09:00.001-04:00

check out top right corner of www.zillow.com. See what the nation's #1 broker does when the market is soft...

Yikes!!

2008-05-12T09:09:00.002-04:00

http://www.nypost.com/seven/05122008/news/regionalnews/trouble_in_li_paradise_110497.htm

Yikes!! They're naming names....I have empathy--these people must be soooo humiliated.....

This sounds very interesting.........

2008-05-10T10:39:00.003-04:00

67 Sag Harbor Turnpike

Contact: Kevin SneddonCEO and BrokerCell: (917) 952-8329Email: kevin@projectrealestate.net
Exclusively offered at July - Labor Day: $175K.Description:On a secluded shy-acre located at the end of a private drive - yet steps to Main Street in Bridgehampton, this brand new gated compound is truly in a class all by itself. Every aspect of this property has been styled by accomplished designer Karen Gorman of Village and City Interiors - and the result is an exceptional, "magazine quality" home. Nowhere else will you find this type of style, luxury and amazing setting - all within the walking core of Bridgehampton village. Morning coffee at Starbucks - walk. Lunch at Pierre's - walk. Dinner at Bobby Van's - walk. WALK TO CRACK DEALER. Guests coming in on the Jitney - they can walk to your impressive 6,000 sq ft traditional home with 6 bedrooms, 7 bathrooms plus a 400 sq ft fully equipped cabana. Upscale landscape package includes automatic entry gates, heated gunite pool, bluestone terraces, brick patios and foundation walls, Pennsylvania stone retaining walls, specimen trees & shrubs plus large, open and private front & rear lawns. No expense spared. The true pinnacle of quality design and craftsmanship.
Brand New Construction
In-Town Location
July - Labor Day: $175K

Super Secret Agent

2008-05-06T11:41:00.003-04:00

http://www.corcoran.com/agents/profile.aspx?userid=LCC&region=NYC

Golly, this gal's profile just goes to show that most agents--even super exclusive, super snobby ones with half a pedigree (coca-cola, anyone??)and Brooke Astor's apartment as a listing--have profiles that are pure puffery(and that tell us almost nothing, really). You go girl!!

The Georgica

2008-05-06T08:41:00.003-04:00

Hey, there's a new building in New York named 'The Georgica'. Maybe 'The Main Beach' or 'The Two Mile Swallow' is next????
http://www.georgicalife.com/#/intro/

2008-04-26T21:08:00.001-04:00

On a more serious note...please let's all keep Sag Harbor's Marine Lance Cpl. Jordan C. Haerter's family in our thoughts and prayers

seen around town

2008-04-24T19:38:00.002-04:00

handcuffed local broker seen in town court this week...with husband sitting watching....
will THIS incident make the paper???

is anyone else SICK to death of hearing about "SHORT SALES"??????? i get so much spam !!..now it's from local brokers!!

2008-04-21T15:28:00.001-04:00

Hello Everybody,

The price has just been reduced on this property, but be aware that this is a SHORT SALE and ALL OFFERS will be presented to the bank. Here is your chance to find the “steal” that the buyers out there have been asking for. House has been totally renovated with hardwood floors, stainless appliances, new paint, etc. Located on a quiet street. Easy to show. Please bring your buyers and help this client sell his home.

Thank you

Folio# 62431 elliman.com ID H53337
Sale IN# 53337
All Photos
41 Seabright Avenue, East Hampton EH Springs

2008-04-16T12:25:00.001-04:00

http://www.cnbc.com/id/24155570

Really exciting bio

2008-04-15T14:54:00.003-04:00

As we here at a certain unnamed RE company are updating our bios (making them shorter and more "readable"), here is a perfect example of what not to do when writing your bio. i think i fell asleep three times while reading this....
http://townandcountry.hreo.com/html/agent.jsp?type=home&aid=7927

2008-04-11T20:11:00.001-04:00

what happened to andrew saunders? i thought he left sir and went out on his own....sir still has his listings?

2008-04-05T17:34:00.001-04:00

Finally figured out how to do this. Feeling quite honored Blond Girl. Thanks

this is funny

2008-04-05T11:35:00.001-04:00

http://www.reagentinct.com/2008/03/28/the-24-worst-bad-mls-photos-of-the-year/

2008-03-26T21:53:00.001-04:00

well, looks like we got the confirmation that tiger did NOT buy the SH property. interesting that there were three bidders on a 65 million dollar property in a recession!!!

tiger

2008-03-25T18:22:00.002-04:00

spoke to my attorney today..he heard from listing broker of property that tiger woods SUPPOSEDLY bought that he DEFINITELY did NOT buy it. in fact, the new owner is upset because there are so many media helicopters flying circles around his house, he can't get any peace. AND, tiger denied it today in interview with cnbc.

Flash: Hot Story

2008-03-21T21:02:00.002-04:00

Sotheby's hot shot in Bridgehampton is starting his own agency. Hint: maybe he will finally sell his own behemoth monstrosity?

2008-03-17T17:29:00.000-04:00

anyone have any frantic calls from customers at Bear Sterns?

interesting news for joe farrell.....

2008-03-09T09:58:00.000-04:00

http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601103&sid=aj.fZzRFg5eM&refer=news

hmmm.....

2008-03-09T09:55:00.000-04:00

East Hampton paper denies hiding real estate story
An East Hampton Press columnist wrote a two-part opinion column excoriating people in the real estate community for accusing his paper and The East Hampton Star of being paid off to keep a story out of its pages "about a prominent real estate broker who supposedly decked his wife at an East Hampton restaurant." The Star looked for a police report on the incident, and could not find one. (Neither could Newsday.) Tom Clavin goes on: "At least a dozen people in the past two weeks, separately, maintained they knew that the real reason that the incident had not been reported in the East Hampton newspapers was the advertising salespeople at those newspapers put pressure on the editors to keep the story out of print. This is, of course, absurd."
Posted by Valerie Kellogg on March 7, 2008 4:51 PM Permalink

I heard...

2008-02-11T20:06:00.000-05:00

I heard Nicols (where "it's all bad") is closing?!What the hell?! And the bowling alley bar is going to become chic.

2008-02-11T19:58:00.000-05:00

word has it that the self proclaimed "broker of the hamptons" ALLEGEDLY punched his wife (also a broker)right off a bar stool, and a bartender in a local bar ...this confirmed by local police (allegedly). Said broker is also, allegedly, trying to keep it out of the local papers by promising to a lot more advertising than he already does. Maybe it will make it in the Independent...they seem to print anything.

2008-02-09T20:03:00.000-05:00

50 Briarcroft, SPRINGS...summer rental for $180,000... WHAT THE HELL!!!!
what is going on here???????

rumor

2008-02-04T10:53:00.000-05:00

rumor has it that j crew crew cuts is negotiating on old victory garden space (1st floor) and frederic fekkai is negotiating for the 2nd floor space.

2008-01-31T15:29:00.000-05:00

instead of brokers, this is what came to my open house today....

Control Freak

2008-01-29T11:59:00.000-05:00

I heard a good one about a spec builder who sold a house to a nice young (very high profile) couple to the tune of a lot of $.
The couple, now feverishly trying to make a few adjustments to make it their own, hired their friend a successful decorator and close college pal, to do the project.
Upon finding this out the builder threw a tantrum saying that he did not see how he could honor his guarantees, and it was really not advisable, and this “is not how we do things in the Hamptons”
I guess the buyers made the common mistake of thinking the house was theirs.

2008-01-27T19:59:00.000-05:00

Had a day today that qualifies for BROKER BREAKDOWN...showed a rental that had an alarm that was going off when i walked in the door...could hear it, ran around, looked everywhere and couldnt find it. then my customer started looking. FINALLY WE (yes, we, i cant do this by myself)found it in a little closet in the kitchen, tucked behind some sort of apron or something, when it started making a LOUD wailing, screeching, ear piercing HOWL. of course then the phone starts ringing...the dreaded alarm company..only the two cordless phones in the house can't be used..THEY ONLY RING, you can't answer them!! AARRRGGG!!! of course, this is the house my customer wants...only the owner is nowhere to be found, AND i'm not even sure that it's actually available for rent!!
Then I had a walkthru for a closing on Tuesday, and the buyer has decided that he wants to renegotiate the purchase price and he's willing to go to court to make it happen.
Love this job!!!

2008-01-24T21:23:00.000-05:00

this was set to me by a friend/customer of mine...................... and now sharing in a complete shock. Is this how we really communicate? Like cows being drawn towards the barn? I must say that I am bewildered by our workforce and the guady likes that suround us.

-----Original Message-----From: DePersia, Gary To: gdp4ams@aol.comSent : Fri, 18 Jan 2008 8:30 amSubject: Summer 2008 in the HamptoinsIt¹s that time of year again. Yes it is. As I write this (mid January) Iknow, your holiday ornaments and gifts are hardly put away and your NewYears hangover is just now abating. And while your St Barth¹s or PalmBeach or Aspen tan and memories are still aglow, it is time nonethelessto think about......The Hamptons.Soon, very soon, you will start to realize that Summer2008 is on its way. You know, "time and tide..." and all that. And wherewill you be this summer? Staying with friends? Or at a small cozy innlistening to your neighbors? Remember there are no Little Nells or IsledeFrance¹s in the Hamptons. Never were, never will be. But the good newsisthat you have options and lots of them. Since last fall those in theknowhave been grazing our real estate pastures, sorting through the wheatandchaff of sale and rental listings. Many made decisions while many morearenow coming out to resume the hunt. Please go tohttps://webmail.ihostexchange.net/owa/redir.aspx?C=72b8e537d4544c97a27455968fe98b24&URL=http%3a%2f%2fmyhamptonhomes.com%2f to see a selection of my personallistings for sale as well as a number of rental listings. A morecomplete selection can be found at https://webmail.ihostexchange.net/owa/redir.aspx?C=72b8e537d4544c97a27455968fe98b24&URL=http%3a%2f%2fwww.corcoran.com%2fhamptons%2fAnd if you still don¹t see it there contact me to discuss your personalneeds.So sooner, rather than later, contact me to figure out where you¹ll beinthe Summer of 2008. After all, how many friends do you have to staywith?Best Regards,Gary

2008-01-24T20:07:00.000-05:00

welcome jakesmom...had to post one of your stories from today...feel free to post ANYTHING you hear from SH..

2008-01-24T19:58:00.001-05:00

Derf----where are you? post something will ya?

gossip

2008-01-24T19:53:00.000-05:00

So I heard an interesting story today about a former Dunemere person who is ALLEGEDLY in a bit of lawsuit trouble because her allegedly vicious dog took a bite out of a PRU AA....any guesses as to who that is?????

$1 Million Rental in Sagaponack

2008-01-23T21:07:00.000-05:00

Have you read about the Million Dollar Rental in Sagaponack?

Silly Real Estate Humor

2008-01-17T22:27:00.000-05:00

A real estate agent was driving around with a new trainee when she spotted a charming little house with a hand-lettered "For Sale" sign out front.

After briskly introducing herself and her associate to the startled occupant, the real estate agent proceeded to cruise from room to room, opening closets and cupboards, testing faucets and pointing out where, "a new light fixture here and a little paint there", would help. "Oh, and the dogs will have to be closed off outside during viewings!"

Pleased with her assertiveness, the new realtor was confident that the owner would sign an exclusive mandate.

"Ma'am," the man said, "I appreciate the home-improvement tips and all, but I think you read my sign wrong. It says, 'Hounds for sale'"

Sag Harbor Year Round Rental

2008-01-17T08:51:00.000-05:00

Anyone know of a min. 3B 2B in Sag Harbor - $2400 max. year round, starting in May? tenant can leave in July/August if need be.

2008-01-16T15:15:00.000-05:00

IS ANYONE GOING TO USE THIS THING?????
Here's something to think about.....what do you all think about going backwards 5% at the start of the year (commission)? Flan-what is the policy there? do you stay at one commission split level, or does it change?

2008-01-15T09:45:00.000-05:00

Okay...so you know that just by creating an account, or by signing in, you can write your own posts. you don't necessarily just have to comment on other posts....

2008-01-14T21:09:00.000-05:00

Here we go again everyone.......please contribute anything....